My Life 

My life has been a long line of opportunities missed. Most of them, I was too stupid to recognise, until it was too late. Some of them, I saw, but was too scared, or too lazy, or whatever, to take.

Now comes a new one. One that could change my life completely, and take me in a new, wonderful direction. What shall I do? Do I have the guts to take it, or am I so afraid of change, that I'm willing to continue as I was, even though I can clearly see the abyss ahead? Is even the possibility of having this dream come true so frightening, that I'd rather die than have it happen?

I want to cry to the universe, why, oh WHY couldn't you leave me to die in peace?! But the universe doesn't listen, it doesn't care. And has nothing to do with this. Fate? God? I don't believe in fate, and the god I believe in doesn't grant wishes or arrange things on this level...

I want to hug my beech-tree. It has always listened to me. It has never answered, but it's a good listener.

And it wouldn't help a bit. As I know perfectly well...